The writer called the Timnite Samson's wife even though the engaged couple had not yet consummated their marriage (v. 15).
"The usual length of a [wedding] celebration was seven days and the marriage was not consummated until the end of that period."261
Samson's loyalty to his parents above his "wife"is understandable since he had not yet consummated his marriage to her (v. 16).
Samson's "wife"was afraid that her guests would kill her and her family because of Samson's riddle.262Ironically, Samson could have defended her and her family easily with his great strength. Evidently the Philistines thought she had some part in proposing the riddle and either knew the answer to it or could find out what the answer was.
Samson "could not withstand the corrosive influence of three or four days of weeping."263
He finally told her the answer, and she then passed it on to the Philistines in a misguided attempt to protect herself and her father's household.
"In calling her a heifer' he was ridiculing her for her untamed and stubborn spirit (cf. Jer. 50:11; Hosea 4:16)."264
Perhaps to avoid recognition or to preclude having vengeance taken on him by the Philistines in Timnah, Samson trekked down to Ashkelon 23 miles southwest of Timnah. There he killed 30 Philistine men and took their clothes as booty. He gave these garments to the wedding guests and went back home to Zorah in disgust without claiming his bride who had deceived him.
The writer said God's Spirit motivated Samson to slaughter the 30 Philistines in Ashkelon (v. 19). Samson was not just taking personal revenge for what his Timnite guests had done to him. He was perhaps unwittingly fulfilling his role as a judge in Israel by slaying the enemies of God's people. This was an act of holy war though Samson appears to have carried it out with carnal vengeance. He did God's will but for the wrong reason. God had chosen Samson as His instrument to begin defeating the Philistines, and He would use him for that purpose even though Samson was a reluctant servant. Thus we see God's providence overcoming the problem that Samson posed.
It was after Samson had paid his debt of 30 garments that the text says he became angry. The object of his wrath here was his "wife,"not the Philistines.
Samson did not intend to abandon his plan to marry the Timnite (15:1-2). He went back home to let his anger cool.
". . . instead of looking at the wrong by which Samson felt himself aggrieved, and trying to mitigate his wrath, the parents of the woman made the breach irreparable by giving their daughter as a wife to his companion."265
Samson's self-will ironically yielded no satisfaction for him. By disregarding his God-given privileges he lost his bet with the Philistines, his wardrobe, his wife, and his honor. Samson's basic problem was that he did not submit to God's authority over his life. This authority problem manifested itself first in his refusal to submit to his parents' authority (v. 3; cf. 17:6; 21:25). Samson did not exercise self-discipline. He let his passions control him (cf. 1 Cor. 9:27). Self-discipline is essentially a matter of submission to God's authority, not a matter of self-denial. Separation is essentially unto God, not just from things.
