Optical Illusion
Phoney
Memorial Fund
Zoo Keeper
Old Truck
Skin Deep or Deep Skin
Topic : Appearances
Quotes
- A mule dressed in a tuxedo is still a mule. - Anon
- If you see a man holding a clipboard and looking official, the chances are good that he is supposed to be doing something menial. - Wayne C. Fields, Jr.
Optical Illusion
When architect Sir Christopher Wren designed the interior of Windsor Town Hall near London in 1689, he built a ceiling supported by pillars. After city fathers had inspected the finished building, they decided the ceiling would not stay up and ordered Wren to put in some more pillars.
Englands greatest architect didnt think the ceiling needed any more support, so he pulled a fast one. He added four pillars that did not do anything -- they dont even reach the ceiling. The optical illusion fooled the municipal authorities, and today the four sham pillars amuse many a tourist.
Phoney
During one of his political campaigns, a delegation called on Theodore Roosevelt at his home in Oyster Bay, Long Island. The President met them with his coat off and his sleeves rolled up.
Ah, gentlemen, he said, come down to the barn and we will talk while I do some work.
At the barn, Roosevelt picked up a pitchfork and looked around for the hay. Then he called out, John, wheres all the hay?
Sorry, sir, John called down from the hayloft. I aint had time to toss it back down again after you pitched it up while the Iowa folks were here.
Memorial Fund
In 1884 a young man died, and after the funeral his grieving parents decided to establish a memorial to him. With that in mind they met with Charles Eliot, president of Harvard University. Eliot received the unpretentious couple into his office and asked what he could do. After they expressed their desire to fund a memorial, Eliot impatiently said, Perhaps you have in mind a scholarship.
We were thinking of something more substantial than that perhaps a building, the woman replied.
In a patronizing tone, Eliot brushed aside the idea as being too expensive and the couple departed. The next year, Eliot learned that this plain pair had gone elsewhere and established a $26 million memorial named Leland Stanford Junior University, better known today as Stanford!
Zoo Keeper
The visitor to the zoo noticed one of the keepers sobbing quietly in a corner and on inquiry was told that the elephant had died.
Fond of him, was he? the visitor asked.
Its not that, came the reply. Hes the chap who has to dig the grave.
Old Truck
A Texas rancher driving through Vermont had to stop to let a farmers cows cross the road. As the farmer passed in front of the Cadillac convertible, the rancher called out to him, How much land you got, partner?
Wal, the farmer said, my land runs all the way down there to them alders along the brook. On the meadow side, over there, it goes clean up to those larches on the hill.
You know, said the rancher, I got a spread in Texas and I can get in my pickup and drive all day without reaching any of my boundary lines.
That so? said the farmer. I had a truck like that once.
Skin Deep or Deep Skin
One day while walking through an old overgrown citrus grove I happened upon a lemon tree. It had large beautiful ripe lemons just right for pie. I picked the best the tree had to offer and was eager to get home but before I left I decided to cut one open for a taste. I opened my knife and split one in half only to find that there was no meat only rind to the core. Unfortunately it is the same with many Christians in the church today. They look, talk, and act like Christians but their facade runs to the core and they have no real meat. In the end their Christianity is appearance only and not in the heart.
Andrew Mock