Paul gave instructions concerning the church's responsibility for its widows to clarify how and for whom the church should provide special care. Widows have been and still are specially vulnerable individuals. As such God has always shown special concern for their protection (cf. Deut. 10:18; 24:17; Ps. 68:5; Isa. 1:17; Luke 2:37). The early church mirrored His attitude (Acts 6:1; 9:39).
". . . the real widow seems to be set up as an ideal in contrast to the young widows in much the same way that Timothy is in contrast to the false teachers (4:6-16; 6:11-16)."172
This whole discussion of widows, then, may focus on the younger widows in particular. They may be the same women Paul spoke of in 2 Timothy 3:6-7 who were responding positively to the false teachers. This may explain the inordinate length of the section.
5:3-4 "The basic thought of the word widow' is that of loneliness. The word comes from an adjective meaning bereft' and speaks of her resultant loneliness as having been bereft of her husband."173
Paul first distinguished two kinds of widows in the church. First, there were the bereaved who had children or grandchildren who could support them. Second, there were those who had no family to care for them, the bereft as well as bereaved. The Christian physical relatives of the former group should care for the first type (cf. Mark 7:10-12; Eph. 6:2).174The church should care for the latter group and presumably widows with non-supportive family members. The church should honor this second group of widows, the extremely dependent, rather than looking down on them.
"It is what a person is, not what he has, that is the proper gauge of honour, or of dishonour . . ."175
5:5-6 However not all in the second category should receive regular financial help. Only those widows without children or supporting relatives (Gr. memonomeme, "left alone") who give evidence that they are looking to God for their needs and are seeking to honor Him with their lives qualify (cf. Anna in Luke 2:36-38). These are "widows indeed."Widows who give themselves to the pursuit of pleasure rather than to the pursuit of God do not qualify for regular support. These women receive in their lives the wages of their sin: spiritual deadness. The term "dead"describes widows who are believers (cf. James 2:17).
"To have pleasure in life is a legitimate and healthy thing; but to live for pleasure, as some people do, and did even in Timothy's day, is an unworthy, and unhealthy, thing. The difference between Christians is largely a matter of appetite--is he satisfied, with the things of God, or does he hanker after the things of the world?"176
"It has been my experience in three different pastorates that godly widows are a spiritual powerhouse' in the church. They are the backbone of the prayer meetings. They give themselves to visitation, and they swell the ranks of teachers in the Sunday School. It has also been my experience that, if a widow is notgodly, she can be a great problem to the church. She will demand attention, complain about what the younger people do, and often hang on the telephone' and gossip. (Of course, it is not really gossip.' She only wants her friends to be able to pray more intelligently' about these matters!)"177
5:7 Timothy was to teach these things so family members in the church would shoulder their rightful responsibility. He was also to do so to encourage the widows to seek the Lord rather than pursuing lives of "wanton pleasure"(v. 6).
5:8 Paul cited a commonly recognized responsibility to encourage the relatives of widows to maintain them. Family members have a universally recognized duty to care for one another. Even unbelievers acknowledge this. If a Christian fails here, he behaves contrary to the teaching of his faith and is in this particular worse than the typical unbeliever who helps his needy relations. Even the Lord Jesus made provision for His mother's care as He hung on the cross (John 19:26-27).
"The Christian who falls below the best heathen standard of family affection is the more blameworthy, since he has, what the heathen has not, the supreme example of love in Jesus Christ."178
5:9-10 Evidently the Ephesian church had a "list"of "widows indeed"who received regular support from the congregation. A widow had to meet three qualifications to get her name on this list.
1. She had to be at least 60 years old.
"Sixty was the recognized age in antiquity when one became an old' man or woman . . ."179
At this age most widows probably became incapable of providing for their own needs, and most would no longer have the opportunity to remarry.
2. She had to have been a one-man woman. The same qualification existed for elders and deacons (3:2, 12). Following the same interpretation given in 3:2, this would mean that she was unqualified if she had been unfaithful, promiscuous, or polyandrous.180Remarriage after the death of her spouse would not necessarily disqualify her.
3. She had to have established a reputation for good works. Paul cited five typical examples of good works.
a. She had reared her children responsibly, assuming she had children. This evidenced good works in the home.
b. She had been hospitable. This demonstrated good works in her community.
c. She had humbly served her Christian brothers and sisters. "Washed the saints' feet"seems to be a figure of speech for humble service in the church family.
d. She had helped people in special need, an example of good works toward the needy.
e. She had "devoted herself"to good works. Good works had been important to her presumably as an expression of her faith in Christ.
The idea that Paul was describing a special order of widows with spiritual and charitable duties to perform for which they received remuneration lacks foundation.181Such an order existed in later centuries, but its existence in the infancy of the church is indefensible.182
5:11-12 It was not wise to place younger widows on this list, and Paul explained why. Younger widows' sensual desires would be stronger, and these feelings would make it very hard for them to remain committed to serving Christ wholeheartedly as single women.
"The metaphor is that of a young animal trying to free itself from the yoke, and becoming restive through its fulness of life."183
Paul evidently assumed that this commitment to the Lord characterized those on the list (cf. v. 5). If the church leaders placed them on the list and they wanted to remarry, they would have to set aside this pledge of devotion to and service of Christ alone.184They would thereby incur some form of temporal condemnation. Perhaps this condemnation came from their consciences, their church family, or elsewhere. It was certainly not eternal condemnation.
Another interpretive option is that perhaps these verses describe more particularly a younger Christian widow faced with the temptation of marrying an unbeliever (cf. 1 Cor. 7:39).185Her sensual desires might overpower her commitment to do God's will and lead her to live contrary to the faith that she professed. Many English translations render the Greek word pistin("faith,"v. 12) "pledge."Obviously setting aside her previous pledge does not mean breaking her pledge to her husband since Paul encouraged widows to remarry (v. 14).
"The explanation for Paul's strong words apparently lay in his view of widowhood as a spiritual commitment. He did not want younger widows to accept the calling of widowhood and then renounce that call with the appearance of any eligible man. It was better to allow them to plan for remarriage as he directed in 5:14."186
5:13-15 Placement on the list of supported widows would not be good for younger widows because it would open them to the temptation of idleness as well as inconsistency. They would normally face temptation to use their energy and time in too much talking and getting into other people's affairs. In short, they would fail to do constructive activities and instead become involved in what was destructive. Contrast the behavior of the commended widows in verse 10.
"In their visits to homes they pick up private matters and spread them abroad. This is always a snare to those who go from home to home or church to church."187
In view of these possibilities Paul encouraged younger widows to remarry. In the ancient world most people expected that a widow would remarry.188The apostle urged the younger widows to use their strength to bear children and to care for their families, the primary duties of a typical Christian wife (cf. Titus 2:5). By doing so, they would not give the enemy (any accuser of believers) an opportunity to criticize them for going back on their pledge to serve Christ as a "widow indeed."Evidently this had already happened in the Ephesian church (v. 15). In forsaking their professed service of Christ in this way some had turned aside to follow Satan. This is a strong description of the real situation involved in going back on a commitment to Christ.
Did Paul mean that every young widow, and perhaps every young woman, should get married and bear children? I think not. This was the typical role of a young woman in Paul's day and still is today worldwide. This seems to be another example of his presenting the typical situation with room for exceptions assumed.
"The wife who works simply to get luxuries may discover too late that she has lost some necessities. It may be all right to have what money can buy, ifyou do not lose what money cannot buy."189
5:16 In conclusion, Paul sought to correct a possible misunderstanding. He wrote that financially capable women should maintain the widows in their families so the church would not have to support them. Probably he referred to "any woman"to clarify that this duty applied to women who did not have living or believing husbands as well as to male heads of households.
"Certainly we must honor our parents and grandparents and seek to provide for them if they have needs. Not every Christian family is able to take in another member, and not every widow wants to live with her children. Where there is sickness or handicap, professional care is necessary, and perhaps this cannot be given in a home. Each family must decide what God's will is in the matter, and no decision is easy. The important thing is that believers show love and concern and do all they can to help each other."190
"Paul's advice [in 5:9-16] focused on the three terms, respect, compassion, and responsibility."191
