So David asked the Lord, “Should I march up against the Philistines? Will you hand them over to me?” The Lord said to David, “March up, for I will indeed ¹  hand the Philistines over to you.”

Joab replied, “I will not wait around like this for you!” He took three spears in his hand and thrust them into the middle of Absalom while he was still alive in the middle of the oak tree. ¹ 

So David sent messengers to the people of Jabesh Gilead and told them, “May you be blessed by the Lord because you have shown this kindness ¹  to your lord Saul by burying him.

When all the leaders ¹  of Israel came to the king at Hebron, King David made an agreement with them ²  in Hebron before the Lord. They designated ³  David as king over Israel.

So David marched against Baal Perazim and defeated them there. Then he said, “The Lord has burst out against my enemies like water bursts out.” So he called the name of that place Baal Perazim. ¹ 

Messengers ¹  told David what had happened, ²  so he summoned them, for the men were thoroughly humiliated. The king said, “Stay in Jericho ³  until your beards have grown again; then you may come back.”

Then Amnon said to Tamar, “Bring the cakes into the bedroom; then I will eat from your hand.” So Tamar took the cakes that she had prepared and brought them to her brother Amnon in the bedroom.

Then the king said to them, “I will do whatever seems best to you.” So the king stayed beside the city gate, while all the army marched out by hundreds and by thousands.

When they were near the big rock that is in Gibeon, Amasa came to them. Now Joab was dressed in military attire and had a dagger in its sheath belted to his waist. When he advanced, it fell out. ¹ 

Then the king said to Amasa, “Call the men of Judah together for me in three days, ¹  and you be present here with them too.”

he ¹  went and took the bones of Saul and of his son Jonathan ²  from the leaders ³  of Jabesh Gilead. (They had secretly taken ⁴  them from the plaza at Beth Shan. It was there that Philistines ⁵  publicly exposed their corpses ⁶  after ⁷  they ⁸  had killed Saul at Gilboa.)

But he made a stand in the middle of that area. He defended ¹  it and defeated the Philistines; the Lord gave them a great victory.

So Tamar went to the house of Amnon her brother, who was lying down. She took the dough, kneaded it, made some cakes while he watched, ¹  and baked them. ² 

My advice therefore is this: Let all Israel from Dan to Beer Sheba – in number like the sand by the sea! – be mustered to you, and you lead them personally into battle.

Now David’s soldiers ¹  and Joab were coming back from a raid, bringing a great deal of plunder with them. Abner was no longer with David in Hebron, for David ²  had sent him away and he had left in peace.

David inquired, “How were things going? ¹  Tell me!” He replied, “The people fled from the battle and many of them ²  fell dead. ³  Even Saul and his son Jonathan are dead!”

So David and his men went on their way. But Shimei kept going along the side of the hill opposite him, yelling curses as he threw stones and dirt at them. ¹ 

Joab son of Zeruiah and the servants of David also went out and confronted them at the pool of Gibeon. One group stationed themselves on one side of the pool, and the other group on the other side of the pool.

So I stood over him and put him to death, since I knew that he couldn’t live in such a condition. ¹  Then I took the crown which was on his head and the ²  bracelet which was on his arm. I have brought them here to my lord.” ³ 

This is what the Lord says: ‘I am about to bring disaster on you ¹  from inside your own household! ²  Right before your eyes I will take your wives and hand them over to your companion. ³  He will have sexual relations with ⁴  your wives in broad daylight! ⁵