So David sent messengers to the people of Jabesh Gilead and told them, “May you be blessed by the Lord because you have shown this kindness ¹  to your lord Saul by burying him.

His servants said to him, “What is this that you have done? While ¹  the child was still alive, you fasted and wept. Once the child was dead you got up and ate food!”

King David went in, sat before the Lord, and said, “Who am I, O Lord God, and what is my family, ¹  that you should have brought me to this point?

David sent messengers to Ish-bosheth son of Saul with this demand: ¹  “Give me my wife Michal whom I acquired ²  for a hundred Philistine foreskins.”

These words of Ish-bosheth really angered Abner and he said, “Am I the head of a dog that belongs to Judah? This very day I am demonstrating ¹  loyalty to the house of Saul your father and to his relatives ²  and his friends! I have not betrayed you into the hand of David. Yet you have accused me of sinning with this woman today! ³ 

Joab replied to the king, “May the Lord your God make the army a hundred times larger right before the eyes of my lord the king! But why does my master the king want to do this?”

David said to the young man ¹  who was telling him this, “How do you know that Saul and his son Jonathan are dead?” ² 

including ¹  Aram, ²  Moab, the Ammonites, the Philistines, and Amelek. This also included some of the plunder taken from ³  King Hadadezer son of Rehob of Zobah.

Then the king replied to him, “Why should you continue speaking like this? You and Ziba will inherit the field together.”

That’s not the way things are. There is a man from the hill country of Ephraim named Sheba son of Bicri. He has rebelled ¹  against King David. Give me just this one man, and I will leave the city.” The woman said to Joab, “This very minute ²  his head will be thrown over the wall to you!”

David said to the young man who told this to him, “Where are you from?” He replied, “I am an Amalekite, the son of a resident foreigner.” ¹ 

Joab replied, “As surely as God lives, if you had not said this, it would have been morning before the people would have abandoned pursuit ¹  of their brothers!”

So now, O Lord God, make this promise you have made about your servant and his family a permanent reality. ¹  Do as you promised, ² 

Joab replied, “I will not wait around like this for you!” He took three spears in his hand and thrust them into the middle of Absalom while he was still alive in the middle of the oak tree. ¹ 

David said to the messenger, “Tell Joab, ‘Don’t let this thing upset you. ¹  There is no way to anticipate whom the sword will cut down. ²  Press the battle against the city and conquer ³  it.’ Encourage him with these words.” ⁴ 

So Joab visited ¹  the king at his home. He said, “Today you have embarrassed all your servants who have saved your life this day, as well as the lives of your sons, your daughters, your wives, and your concubines.

“Go, tell David, ‘This is what the Lord says: I am offering you three forms of judgment. Pick one of them and I will carry it out against you.’”

(Now she was wearing a long robe, ¹  for this is what the king’s virgin daughters used to wear.) So Amnon’s ²  attendant removed her and bolted the door ³  behind her.

Then the king and his men advanced to Jerusalem ¹  against the Jebusites who lived in the land. The Jebusites ²  said to David, “You cannot invade this place! Even the blind and the lame will turn you back, saying, ‘David cannot invade this place!’”

Today I am weak, even though I am anointed as king. These men, the sons of Zeruiah, are too much for me to bear! ¹  May the Lord punish appropriately the one who has done this evil thing!” ²