May his blood whirl over ¹  the head of Joab and the entire house of his father! ²  May the males of Joab’s house ³  never cease to have ⁴  someone with a running sore or a skin disease or one who works at the spindle ⁵  or one who falls by the sword or one who lacks food!”

Joab answered, “Get serious! ¹  I don’t want to swallow up or destroy anything!

Asahel chased Abner, without turning to the right or to the left as he followed Abner.

Gad went to David and told him, “Shall seven ¹  years of famine come upon your land? Or shall you flee for three months from your enemy with him in hot pursuit? Or shall there be three days of plague in your land? Now decide ²  what I should tell the one who sent me.”

The Gibeonites said to him, “We ¹  have no claim to silver or gold from Saul or from his family, ²  nor would we be justified in putting to death anyone in Israel.” David asked, ³  “What then are you asking me to do for you?”

But Absalom said nothing to Amnon, either bad or good, yet Absalom hated Amnon because he had humiliated his sister Tamar.

The one who touches them must use an iron instrument or the wooden shaft of a spear. They are completely burned up right where they lie!” ¹ 

Abner said to him, “Turn aside to your right or to your left. Capture one of the soldiers ¹  and take his equipment for yourself!” But Asahel was not willing to turn aside from following him.

But Ittai replied to the king, “As surely as the Lord lives and as my lord the king lives, wherever my lord the king is, whether dead or alive, ¹  there I ²  will be as well!”

O mountains of Gilboa, may there be no dew or rain on you, nor fields of grain offerings! ¹  For it was there that the shield of warriors was defiled; ²  the shield of Saul lies neglected without oil. ³ 

Then all the people came and encouraged David to eat food while it was still day. But David took an oath saying, “God will punish me severely ¹  if I taste bread or anything whatsoever before the sun sets!”

Don’t report it in Gath, don’t spread the news in the streets of Ashkelon, ¹  or the daughters of the Philistines will rejoice, the daughters of the uncircumcised will celebrate!

So David said to all his servants who were with him in Jerusalem, ¹  “Come on! ²  Let’s escape! ³  Otherwise no one will be delivered from Absalom! Go immediately, or else he will quickly overtake us and bring ⁴  disaster on us and kill the city’s residents with the sword.” ⁵ 

At this very moment he is hiding out in one of the caves or in some other similar place. If it should turn out that he attacks our troops first, ¹  whoever hears about it will say, ‘Absalom’s army has been slaughtered!’

All the men of Judah replied to the men of Israel, “Because the king is our close relative! Why are you so upset about this? Have we eaten at the king’s expense? ¹  Or have we misappropriated anything for our own use?”

“When a traveler arrived at the rich man’s home, ¹  he did not want to use one of his own sheep or cattle to feed ²  the traveler who had come to visit him. ³  Instead, he took the poor man’s lamb and cooked ⁴  it for the man who had come to visit him.”

The king said, “Did Joab put you up to all of this?” ¹  The woman answered, “As surely as you live, my lord the king, there is no deviation to the right or to the left from all that my lord the king has said. For your servant Joab gave me instructions. He has put all these words in your servant’s mouth.

Now send word quickly to David and warn him, ¹  “Don’t spend the night at the fords of the desert ²  tonight. Instead, be sure you cross over, ³  or else the king and everyone who is with him may be overwhelmed.” ⁴ 

Absalom would then say, “If only they would make me ¹  a judge in the land! Then everyone who had a judicial complaint ²  could come to me and I would make sure he receives a just settlement.”

Now Mephibosheth, Saul’s grandson, ¹  came down to meet the king. From the day the king had left until the day he safely ²  returned, Mephibosheth ³  had not cared for his feet ⁴  nor trimmed ⁵  his mustache nor washed his clothes.