Topic : Theft

Stupid Thief

A bank robber in Los Angeles told the clerk not to give him cash, but to deposit the money to his checking account.

Source unknown

Bonehead Bandits

Two teenagers burst through the front door and raced to the counter with an empty pillow case.

"Put it in,? they demanded of the clerk.

"Put what in"? the attendant asked.

"The money. Put it in and nobody'll get hurt,? they barked.

The puzzled library attendant, who had less than $1 in collected fines in the petty cash box, ducked out the door and called the police. They, too, were dumbfounded.

It's the first attempted library robbery I ever heard of,? said one cop, scratching his head.

The only plausible explanation was that the two careless crooks got the Grandon City, Kansas, bank mixed up with the library. The two buildings are a block apart on corner locations, and at the time, the bank's exterior was partially obstructed by scaffolding.

The youths, believed to be runaways from Florida, were nabbed by police hours after the bungled heist. In keeping with their crime, the bonehead bandits were taken into custody and promptly "booked?.

Campus LIfe, March, 1980, p. 27

The Thief

One night a thief broke into the single-room apartment of French novelist Honore de Balzac. Trying to avoid waking Balzac, the intruder quietly picked the lock on the writer's desk. Suddenly the silence was broken by a sardonic laugh from the bed, where Balzac lay watching the thief.

"Why do you laugh"? asked the thief.

"I am laughing to think what risks you take to try to find money in a desk by night where the legal owner can never find any by day.?

Today in the Word, November 6, 1993

Thief Left Only The Car

I have a friend who, in mid-career, was called into the ministry. In fact, God ultimately led him overseas. At that point he found it necessary to move all his family and as many of their possessions as possible beyond these shores, all the way to the island of Okinawa. He told me, "We packed everything we could in barrels and shipped them on ahead. And then we put all of our possessions that were a part of our trip into our station wagon. We packed that car all the way to the top of the windows.? While driving to the place where they would meet the ship that would take them to the Orient, they stopped for a rest and a bite to eat. While they were inside the restaurant, a thief broke into their station wagon and took everything except the car. Nice of him to leave the car, wasn't it?

"The only thing we had,? he said, "were the articles of clothing on our backs. Our hearts sank to the bottom!" When asked about it later, he said, "Well, I had to face the fact that I was holding real tight to the things in that car. And the Lord simply turned my hands over and gave them a slap...and out came everything that was in that car. And it all became a part of the Father's possession.?

Charles Swindoll, Living Above the Level of Mediocrity, p. 114



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